Picture Credit: Tammy McConaty
Check out my TEDx talk by clicking here.
This is Episode 2 in my TEDx journey series. In case you missed it, check out Episode 1 here.
Hitting “Submit” on my TEDx application was amazingly … anti-climactic.
You know the feeling. You apply for a job you really want. You check your inbox with obsessive rage. You don’t hear back. You send a message to the recruiter. You don’t get a reply.
A year later you get an automated note saying the role was filled…
Like a seasoned rejectee, I assumed rejection.
The next few months were filled with … actual rejection
Companies turned down my proposals for training. Individuals turned down my proposals for coaching:
- Not what they were looking for
- Not enough money
- Not the right time
It was one of my lowest points. I started to doubt leaving my corporate career.
I originally left for several reasons:
- Politics: I was told I needed 7 more years of experience to qualify for a promotion.
- Burnout: I was told to “go faster” even though I was already working nights and weekends.
I wanted to have control over my success, and the freedom to decide what success meant to me.
But here I found myself not even attaining that.
Roll ahead two months and it was my brother’s graduation, a moment of celebration! He had just finished 8 (insane) years of university and pharmacy school. And was headed toward a fantastic residency.
I caught myself … not feeling joy. Was it bad that I felt (gasp) some jealousy?
As kids, I envied how my brother never worried. Good things just came…
Example 1: learning to drive
First time in the driver’s seat I was sweating, out of breath, worried I had hit 5 cars…after just driving down the block.
My brother was a natural.
Example 2: the driving test
I screw up driving by a stop sign
My brother “screws up” by hitting gas on “Park”.
Metaphor:
- I hit the gas pedal on my life, and visibly mess up.
- He hits the gas pedal on his life, but gets shielded from failure.
On the way back home after graduation, of course my flight’s delayed, just my luck.
And sitting in the airport, symbolically stuck with nowhere to go, I really, deeply reflect.
Maybe the fundamental problem is not me, but the way I see.
- Yes, I drove past that stop sign. But I … eventually … got my license.
- Yes, I got rejected for that promotion. But I eventually got a job with more pay.
- Yes, I got stuck in a workplace that wasn’t the right fit. But I eventually started my own company.
I was looking at my life from the wrong angle: through the rear view mirror that only sees failure, instead of the windshield in front of my eyes, with faith my time would come.
And it did.
The plane did eventually take off. I eventually did get home.
And I did check my inbox to find I was accepted for TEDx Logan Circle.
I quickly emailed the organizer Monica that she had so made my day with that message. But that was a vast understatement.
The “yes” for TEDx Logan Circle was one of the happiest days of my life.
I was finally on my way, and now it was time to write the talk.
Coming up next in the series is Episode 3: “Why I Hated my First TEDx Draft: What Was Missing”…
Before getting to the end of the series, you can also check out the TEDx talk below!
